Strategies To Replace Negative Self-talk: Tips For Cultivating Positivity

by | Nov 14, 2023 | Mind

Negative self-talk is pessimistic and focuses only on the bad. Negative self-talk is like an inner critic that stops you from reaching your potential. It can become a permanent way of thinking and believing as time passes. It often sounds like;

“I can never do this.”

“I am unlucky with relationships.”

“Everybody hates me.”

Self-talk is repetitive and can affect your mental health. Therefore, the more you talk positively to yourself, the more motivated you will become. 


  • Limited thinking: you are not able to see opportunities or have a decreased ability to capitalize on these opportunities. This is because you tend to believe in self-criticism and stop trusting your instincts. 
  • Feeling stressed out: negative self-talk promotes a heightened sense of stress as it constantly reminds you of the qualities you are lacking. It will also create significant stress amongst the people around you if you are not careful, and can lead to depression. 
  • Attaining perfection: the lowered self-confidence focuses your attention on being perfect rather than just being great. Perfectionism may sound positive to many, but it involves a lot of time, energy, and stress. In contrast, mere high achievers tend to do better than their perfectionistic counterparts. This is because the more energy you save, the more focused and active your mind will be at what you are doing, allowing you to perform well.
  • Difficult relations: a self-critic is an insecure and emotionally dependent individual. It is difficult for one to trust others in relationships and build strong bonds. You also adopt some negative habits such as lack of communication, doubting one’s actions, and being unable to take your relations forward.
  • Self-blaming: you inculcate the habit of blaming yourself for anything wrong that happens. For example, if your plan is canceled with your friends, you will assume that they don’t want to be around you. This leads to the magnification of your problems.
  • Presuming wrong in everything: you automatically anticipate the worst in everything that is going to happen. This is because you focus on the negative aspects more and filter out all the positive ones, leading you to see things as white or black with no middle ground.


If you are a positive person, the endless stream of unspoken words that run through your head daily will also be positive. Thus, cultivating positivity helps you cope with stressful situations and supports your health instead. Here are some benefits you will enjoy when you talk to yourself with compassion.

  • Improved cardiovascular health
  • Healthy immune system
  • Reduced stress and improved mental health
  • Reduces inflammation
  • Better life expectation
  • Boosts self-confidence
  • Reduced risk of infections
  • A healthier lifestyle with a good diet and no drug abuse


  1. Evaluate your thoughts

If you want to change the way you think, you will have to periodically keep a check on your thoughts. When you find yourself getting involved in self-criticism or viewing something as bad, try to find a way to put a positive spin on your thoughts. You will also have to identify the areas of life that you usually feel negative about, i.e. work, relationships, or social interactions. When the root cause will be treated, your overall perception of life will also change.

  1. Live a healthy lifestyle.

Exercising must be part of your regular days consistently. If you can’t work out for 1 hour in the morning, break the workout session into 5-10 minute chunks of time throughout the day. Staying active will positively boost your mood and reduce the level of stress in your mind. A healthy diet and eating habits is another important thing to do. So, fuel up your body with all the essential nutrients on a regular basis. 

Food and exercise have to be accompanied by good-quality of rest and sleep to keep your mind and body properly functional. Practicing meditation or power yoga before going to sleep or early morning will also gear up your idea of cultivating positivity. 

  1. Add humor to life

When negativity is clouding your mind, laughter can help you immensely. So, allow yourself to smile and laugh by watching a funny reel or enjoying some playtime with your children, animals, or loved ones. It will divert your mind instantly and relieve your stress and tension to a great extent.

  1. Stay in the company of positive people

It is a proven fact that we all have the ability to absorb the energies around us and behave in a similar manner. So, the way you think will be influenced by the outlook and emotions carried by the people around you. You must be very selective of the company you choose to be in. Try spending the majority of your day with your loved ones who care for you selflessly and are positive people. 

Seeing positive words or inspiring images can also help. So, make an effort to add such phrases or pictures to your room wall or office desk.

  1. Practice positive self-talk

Stop being harsh on yourself. Be gentle and kind when you talk about yourself, just the way you would talk about others.  When you address yourself with encouraging words, it gives you strength and motivation to move forward with a positive outlook. If a negative thought enters your mind, evaluate it rationally and respond with positive affirmations that will help you find good in yourself. 

Practicing gratitude is another helpful way of cultivating positivity. The moment you start to be thankful for the things you have in your life, it gives you more confidence and a sense of self-assurance. You will feel content and focus on your strengths rather than flaws and shortcomings. 

Negative self-talk

  • I’m too lazy to get this job done.
  • No one is interested in interacting with me
  • This presentation is too complicated
  • I have never done this before

Positive self-talk

  • I have to improve my lifestyle and prioritize what is important
  • I can open up new channels of communication and let others interact
  • I can tackle it from a different angle
  • This is an opportunity to learn something new.


The words you use for yourself affect the way you will respond to your life. Positive self-talk not only helps you feel optimistic but also motivates and strengthens you to face life challenges. So, this is a great way to overcome negative thinking and improve your self-esteem.

Download the JOYSCORE app to help treat your life in a more positive and healthy manner.

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Dr. Bob Singhal

Professor Bhupendra 'Bob' Singhal, has taught creativity by joy and right-brain thinking, is a renowned international architect, won major design competitions, has over 70 awards, publications, and media mentions, and served as President of the American Institute of Architects South Bay. In 2011, in his book Joy in Health and Happiness: Your Optimal Path to Success, Professor Singhal wrote about the transformative power of joy and helped readers learn to enhance their daily experience of it.


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